5 Life lessons from playing the violin

It’s hard to believe, but I started playing the violin over 25 years ago now.

Reflecting back, I realize now how my relationship with music and the violin changed over the years as I cycled through different phases of life. It was a form of emotional escape in my youth, a way to express myself as a teenager, a way to create and compete in my 20s, and a way of giving back and having fun in my 30s. My violin career manifested in a number of different capacities as well, from professional orchestra to a bluegrass band, and now charity concerts with friendly string quartets. I’ve played just about every style of music possible on the violin including classical, modern, bluegrass, video game music, and many others.

Like most things in life, it’s complicated, but as I was listening to the first audition piece I ever played, the Vitali Chaconne, I reminisced about some of the things that remained consistent across my entire violin journey, and what I learned along the way.

  1. To do anything well requires discipline and hard work, which does not mean repeating more of the same. Any beginner spends the first few years making horrible screeching sounds (don’t worry, that’s normal). I was no different. I squeaked and squealed my way through many Suzuki books, and it was finally toward the middle that I started to make sounds on the violin that might start to qualify as “music”. As I advanced, I began to find the 2-3 hours a day of practice tiring, and it was exceedingly harder to find time to squeeze it in. Despite this, I maintained a consistent practice schedule, but found my skills lacking improvement. It was not until much later that I changed up my practice schedule to not just repeat the same exercises, but to introduce creative techniques that helped me practice in different ways. I saw results a lot faster through structured variation, not structured repetition.

  2. The importance of expressing yourself and recognizing everyone has a different style. There is actually a great deal of creative freedom in classical music on how one can express musicality. Once I knew a piece well enough to not worry about playing in tune or what was coming next, I found myself adjusting where vibratos and trills were placed to give a different tone to the same piece. It was really eye-opening to finally understand that there isn’t just one way to play a piece, which is how classical music is stereotyped. I realized how important and powerful it is to be able to express myself the way I wanted to, even through music that is hundreds of years old. Similarly, recognizing this gave me an appreciation for the way that other people could play the same piece, but in their own unique style, and every time I heard a new way of playing something, I learned something new. If you listen closely - and that’s the key - you can really appreciate and learn from the artistic expressiveness everyone has.

  3. The difference between what society values versus what you do. I don’t think anyone goes into a music career thinking they will make millions and have an abundance of financial independence, but I never expected how little professional music actually makes. Given my socioeconomic background, it did not take me long to make the decision of pursuing technology and giving up a professional music career. There are only so many private lessons, side gigs, and wedding repeats of Canon in D a human can handle on top of orchestra practice and be okay with barely being able to make ends meet or being unable to support family and other medical expenses. At some point, I had to reconcile the thing that I really enjoyed with the reality of life and what society values and is willing to pay for. The irony is that this artistic expression and creativity is actually one of the hardest things to replicate for AI and other technologies, whereas engineering and other tasks we pay more for today are often better suited for automation.

  4. Give yourself grace. The frustration involved in learning violin is endless. I spent years as a beginner playing off-pitch screeches, and then years as an intermediate player making the wrong shifts and played completely out of tune. There are times I practiced the same piece hundreds of times, section by section, only to let nerves get to me on the day-of. There were times I felt I was unfairly evaluated or discriminated against. These things will inevitably happen, but, like I said, life is complicated, and at any given time, a person can have a hundred different things going on, many of which are things we cannot control. It took me a long time to learn to give myself a little grace, at least every once in a while, and not let frustration overtake my outlook.

  5. You can be whatever you want. A lot of people will tell you what you can or should do with your life. They told me that I should continue to only play classical music, that there’s a specific way of moving up and making a career for yourself in this field. Others told me that, since I did not have a certain music pedigree, there was no place for me there - no point trying to apply for certain positions or to get to a certain level of proficiency. For many of us, though, the world is more fluid than that, and it is not so straightforward. Is there really only one way to get to an end goal? I have learned that the answer is no. I believe we can be, and should be, free to be whatever we want, and it is okay (I daresay required) to take an unconventional path.

I hope these shared lessons help add perspective to any difficult journey you might be going through. I know not all of the trials of playing violin are generalizable, but I do think there are things we can take away from specific experiences we have and apply them to other areas of life.

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